MelB’s Ugly Duckling Blog

Nothing makes me squawk louder than only having orange pellets in my food bowl but seeing an ugly website like this one by MelB can inspire me to squawk almost as loudly. Mel posted this a link to this blog on one of my Dad’s favorite blogs about Internet Marketing and, since I love to squawk about ugly websites, I had to check this one out on his recommendation.

Does Mel expect anyone to actually read this mess? Does he have something to hide from the world or something? Even my superior macaw vision that sees far more color than the human eye could barely stand to read it. Even when I did manage to read his single post I had to squawk out loud (SOL in macaw chat talk). It said almost nothing. I’ve read food bag labels that were more inspiring!

OK, so maybe he’s just getting started out with this blog. Maybe this ugly duckling will blossom into a beautiful swan. I myself was ugly for a couple of weeks before I grew feathers. I’ll give MelB the benefit of the doubt and see where he goes with this. He’s obviously got a ways to go with his blog but I wish him well with it even if it’s quite ugly right now.

A Zorse is a Zorse, Of Course

OK, I’m back quickly with an ugly, outdated website dedicated to everyone in the Atlanta GA metro area’s favorite wild ungulate, the Zebra, namely the International Zebra - Zorse - Zonkey Association web site. Guys, please, it’s 2008, not 1998. In fact, this site about Zebras, and their cross breeds like Zorses and Zonkeys, looks like it could have been done even earlier.

First of all they have that idiotic block right click Javascript. Hello! Even a macaw like me knows that a modern browser like Firefox renders that annoying script useless. Frames? Once again, HELLO! And we’re still using an AOL email? Folks please, not even parakeets still use AOL!

Well, this site is a relic of a bygone era of Internet history. Check it out if you dare, or at least before those humans and their striped pals figure out how to self-host WordPress or Joomla.

Vintage Toy Soldiers

My quest for the ugliest web sites once again led me to Blogspot and to this site, Vintage Toy Soldiers. OK, first of all, let’s not use a Courier font, agreed? That’s just ugly. At least I’ll give you points for making the print large enough to be readable. And, if you do take the time to read it, well, what you write about toy soldiers is worthwhile and you seem to have some knowledge and enthusiasm about the topic.

I find the whole idea of vintage toys fascinating since I rarely have a toy that lasts me more than about a week unless it’s made of hard, and I mean very hard, plastic. Why a human would keep an old toy soldier around and not chew it into bits is really beyond my understanding. Why, in fact one time I chewed up one of my toys in less than an hour and I look with pride upon that accomplishment. It just doesn’t make sense to keep toys around unchewed.

Well, anyway, the search for ugly web sites goes on. See you next time.

Auto Repair Parts

While cruising around the blogosphere this past evening I ran across this very ugly site, Auto Repair Parts. Ugly with a capital U! Hideous bright green on black with very small print. Hello Gregg! 1998 is calling and wants their web site back! Geez! And, to make things worse, the words, if you can read them, come off like someone who failed 6th grade writing class. Gregg, hint for you, “They’re going to the store” and “There is the store” and “That is their store”, got it?

Anyway, on the bright side, he tries to give some hints about avoiding dangerous repair parts and so forth. His bio says that he’s in the automotive industry. Maybe they put him in charge of writing sales contracts and he went insane. Don’t visit his blog unless your eyes can stand the pain though!

Butt Implants Web Site

OK, I’ve seen some ugly ones in my day but Justin takes the cake with this little jewel: Butt Implants. This just goes to show that people will blog about anything, including something quite unpleasent like have your rear end pimped out. That makes me appreciate my long and lovely tail feathers even more. The information there is quite interesting, if a bit dull. The dull Blogger Minima template gives it a clinical feel. At least there aren’t any pictures on that blog. I don’t know if I could handle it if there were.

Anyway, give Butt Implants a look and see if it’s one of those things that you’ll never want or at least never own up to wanting! Check it out when you get a chance!

Bananas! Making Money Fast with Terry Didcott

Terry Didcott is obsessed with making money fast it seems. He created this blog, Make Money Hints, as an experiment in search engine placement for those terms. Since Terry has helped out the guy who brings me fresh bananas from time to time I thought that I would help him out by mentioning his site here on my blog.

I will give him my ugly website award since, well, let’s face it, sites made for Google are ugly to human and macaw eyes. Plain and drab is the watch word for these blogs. However, these blogs do make money for their owners from time to time which can translate into free bananas or whatever for their associates. Turning a blog into a bananas is almost always a good thing.

I wish Terry well in his attempt to keep everyone in his family well fed on bananas and Vanilla Wafers. Maybe I should start a blog about bananas. That would be great. I could use a bright yellow color without shame! There are even banana themes here on WordPress! OK, well I’ve probably rambled enough about my favorite fruit. Now I’m hungry and I’ll have to scream until I get some of this delicious and delightful fruit.

Give good ole Terry some help with his Make Money Fast dream and check out his site. Make him go bananas!

This is What Happens If You Don’t Use WordPress

http://wreckineyez.lineagehawaii.com/

The horror of a MS Word created web page! The Horror!!!

Or maybe it’s just good linkbait for their band, hmmmmmmm