Some Things To Squawk About

I have a few things to squawk about today. First of all, this silly little blog got awarded a PR4 by Google while my ‘Dad’s buying guide blog got demoted down to PR3. Hah, Hah! Uh, oh. Daddy is in a bad mood. Darn orange pellets again and no bananas.

Oh well, while I’m munching on these orange pellets let’s see what else I can find. If you want an ugly, and I mean UGLY, WordPress theme Justin over at SEO Zombie has you covered. Check out this hidious creation: Zombie Sniper SEO WordPress Theme. It does look like something somebody dug up. Ick! It’s supposed to be designed to encourage stupid humans to click on ads. Even a macaw like me knows enough to use an ad blocker, geez! Silly humans!

Over at pecannelog there’s this funny mention about the rapper Andre 3000 not tipping. The waiter is now selling the signed receipt on eBay. I guess they’ll get their tip that way. I can’t blame Andre 3000 for not tipping though. I need a vegan diet myself and the service I get is pretty poor as compared to the carnivirous cats who live in this house too.

For those of you who’re like me and sit around in a cage all day, you might like this observation by Kevin, The Stupidity of the Announced Corporate Visit. I usually get my cage cleaned before we have important visitors. How often do you have to clean your cage?

That’s enough blogging for today. I’m going to see how far out of my cage I can fling the rest of my orange pellets.

About Macaws

Some people have asked about macaws, what we like to eat, why we behave the way we do and so forth and so on. So, instead of entertaining you with more stupid human Internet tricks I thought I’d do a Macaw Q&A session.

Q1. Why Don’t You Like Orange Pellets?

A1. Two reasons. First of all, the color is unappealing. Us macaws see more shades of color than you humans. Something that looks fine to your puny eyes looks putrid to us. You see, my wild brethren have to spot tasty fresh fruit from miles away while keeping an eye out for predators, namely you humans and big snakes. This means we have excellent 360 degree vision, not to mention a very discerning eye. Second reason, they taste awful as compared to bananas.

Q2: Why Do You Like Bananas So Much?

A2: Because they taste good! I also like other fruits as well, such as grapes and cherries, but bananas are my favorite.

Q3: Do Macaws Bite?

A3: Stick your finger a little closer to my beak and find out.

Q4: Do Macaws Live to be 100 Years Old?

A4: Perhaps, but, like with humans, it’s rare. We are subject to disease and old age just like humans as they get older, but we don’t have the level of medical care humans do. With proper care and a little luck and maybe just the right amount of bananas, a macaw can live to be between 50 and 70 years old. I was hatched in 2000 so I’m still a spring chicken.

Q5: Can You Talk?

A5: Yes, and I can type too. Macaws do talk but we aren’t refined speakers like an African Gray Parrot or some Amazon parrots. We get excited easy and will lapse into pure macaw-ese squawking quickly. I have a vocabulary of about 30 words but I only use 10 of them regularly. I’ll bet you can guess one that starts with ‘B’.

Q6: Are Macaws Endangered In The Wild?

Q6: Yes, they are. Some species are more endangered than others. Blue and Gold macaws like me are still quite common but other macaw species are facing extinction. This is primarily due to deforestation and illegal pet trade.

I was hatched right here in the USA as were my parents, grandparents and great-grandparents. I’ve been around people all my life, from the moment of my hatching, so I could never live in the wild safely. I would be 100% clueless. However, wild parrots are still grabbed in the wild which is bad, not to mention illegal. If you want to put up with a macaw or any other parrot as a pet, make sure that you buy one from a reputable breeder who hand raises them.

That’s all I have time for right now. If you have any questions about what it is like to be a macaw’s human, please feel free to ask.

Links of the Day: Fun Stuff

Even macaws have to laugh. In fact, we’re a pretty funny species. One of my favorite jokes is to bite a human on the finger, say “Ow!” and then have a big laugh about it. Dull humans rarely see the humor in this though. I have no idea why they don’t. Anyhoo here are some fun things I found while munching on some orange pellets.

Have you ever wanted to be an Evil Overlord? This site gives you some important tips becoming one based on avoiding the standard movie cliches.

Now here’s something that’s unintentionally funny, my thoughts for the day. Some people take themselves waaaay too seriously. Pretty site but the content is laughable, especially the adversion to capital letters.

Google is the king of search, right? This post, 5 Weird And Hilarious Google Search Results, takes a look at a few unintended consequences of searching for stuff on Google.

And, last up before I start screaming for bananas, here are some cats assembling a Christmas tree. Kitties, it is much more fun to take down a tree, trust me.

OK, I did my post for the day. Now where is that human with my bananas?

Links of the Day: Crime Prevention

If you think like I do then not getting a few slices of banana a day is a crime, something worth squawking about. But, if we’re realistic, there are many real crimes out there so let’s take a look at some bloggers who’re helping others prevent becoming a victim of a crime.

Penlangisenja gives some good, common sense advice in the Yahoo 360 post: Crime Prevention – Your Role. The Sacramento Bee also has this excellent advice from a police officer: Crime wave elicits prevention strategies

It looks like the Mesa Arizona Wal-Mart doesn’t think much about crime prevention: Walmart snubs Mesa Az police shoplifting advise. Of course, those door greeters are so freakin’ annoying but I guess they don’t get too many bananas in their job so I guess they take it out on customers.

Harley Nash points out this kind of troublesome auto part theft: Catalytic Converter Thieves. Another reason why to avoid a large vehicle unless you need to haul a large bird around.

Well, if you want to keep criminal’s hands off your bananas you better check around and make sure you’re doing all you can do to prevent crime. Otherwise, you might be left with only orange pellets to eat.